I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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