hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
