Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize