I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
