she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Need sex. Gaining weight.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
We need to get me chipped asap
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
