I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Randomize
