break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
