have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
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