There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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