If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
You don't make any sense
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