yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
