dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize