In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
