Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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