Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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