my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize
