About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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