i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
