too bad you live with your parents still
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
