I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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