I'm eating all of the evidence.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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