The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
only you would photoshop your dick
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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