okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
