It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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