You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
