Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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