I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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