i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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