just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I don't want my vagina anymore.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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