some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Randomize
