So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
