There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
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