I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize
