Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
