I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
now i know why i became what i already was.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
