does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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