the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
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