I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
