At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
