Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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