a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Randomize
