I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
