I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize
