i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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