That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
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