Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Randomize
