you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Randomize
