New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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