I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
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