i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Randomize