with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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