Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
